Lesson 6 – A blow to your own heart
But tell Me, my child, who has dared to wound your heart? (Diary, 1487) – God asks the suffering soul, gently encouraging to the opening of the heart. Each of us could give a different answer to this question. Other people hurt us, we are hurt by temptations with which we do not fight. We can also hurt ourselves if we can not forgive ourselves our bad choices. We inflict wounds on our heart, setting ourselves the requirements of being perfect, not tolerating mistakes and bad decisions. And although it is easy for us to talk about the suffering that others have inflicted on us, it is quite different when we confess to God that the suffering with which we come to Him is due to our sin that a wound that bleeds, bleeds because of the “knife” that I keep in my hand.
Jesus, in this case, never becomes our accuser. He will never say: You have what you deserve! Why? For he knows well that this would distract us from him. Then there would be no chance that the medicine of His mercy would be applied to our wounds. He sees the causes of our sin and wants us to be close to Him in this state – and especially in the state of disappointment with ourselves, the discovery of our own sinfulness. Even more – he himself makes great efforts so that in those moments in which we accuse ourselves, we can enter into a dialogue with him: I see that you suffer much and that you do not have even the strength to converse with me (Diary, 1487). In moments of suffering, even when we do not think about God, he begins to talk to us. He is always on our side, even when in our prayer we tell Him about our sins. He constantly encourages me: … with childlike simplicity talk to Me about everything, for My ears and heart are inclined towards you, and your words are dear to Me (Diary, 921).